Felix is 9 and a half months!

 

It has been a while and I won't go too much into why that is; some of you know and some of you won't (that is if anyone is reading).

I clearly had been burning the candle at both ends and ended up in hospital and the last 3 months have been very very tough. I won't lie.
I am not here to tell my story but Felix's so what I will say is that Felix spent 10 days mainly with his MorMor and a few days with his grandmother (pops and Lala) while I was in hospital trying to figure out what I was going through.

Then Felix and I went to mothers and babies...

Since then we have moved house and now live and own a place on South Brighton...

Felix has been crawling for the past couple of weeks, although he is still a little slow (wounded soldier like but getting much better and now follows me into the kitchen) God he is gorgeous!

We went to a bar in Woolston with the Pankhursts which was nice. Cute kids.

Laura and Massimo came to visit us in mothers and babies...

Felix was an angel as usual...

We have had visitors; like Neenu, NIcki and Iris. Iris and I went to Akaroa with the kids...

Neenu had lots of snuggles with Felix...

Felix and I began to sleep together as night feeds and crying going down was getting too much...

He then began feeding all night and his solid intakes weren't really getting any better. I was getting just as tired in the same bed so have just moved him back to his cot this week.

Trying to settle him in his cot and have left him to cry a little but it breaks my heart. He is still awake 4 times a night but I try to feed him just the once, or twice....

Please Universe let us sleep through the night as soon as possible xxx

 

Felix was pretty brave when we visited Santa at Northlands Mall...

7 months today!

Felix is 7 months and finally we are home after I have spent 2 weeks in hospital.

I won't go into details as it is onwards and upwards from here but I basically had a breakdown and a carcrash at the same time and it all happened the day that Laura and Massimo arrived from Italy.
I burnt out completely after all that has taken place since getting pregnant; trip to Spain where I found out, selling my house in Avondale, packing up the house into boxes, moving to stay with Din in Remuera, buying another house in New Lynn, deciding to move to chch, finding a rental here, moving to chch, selling my place in Auckland to mum and Tony, househunting here while living in a redzoned house that was damp and unstable, albeit in full of character, buying a house here and then having it fall through at the last minute and buying another house. Then there has been some stuff related to being back in chch, stuff with Felix's dad Steve, mastitis 4 times and Felix sick and once in A and E. Oh, and I forgot to mention the birth and then 10 days in hospital post that: the birth that ended in meconium and a ventouse and lots of drama in the hospital. I am not here to complain though, just to state the facts... I may delete them later but at this stage I want to get them out and onto paper. I won't go into my accident and time in hospital though. This is not the time and place.

Felix was weighed and measured yesterday!

He weighs 9.38kg
He is 71cm tall
His head is 46.5cm

He is adorable

Felix is 6 months and 1 week

Getting Felix to sleep is still a battle. The nights of no feeding only lasted 3 nights with me going in once to put on the white noise. Since then he has woken between 2-3 times so I feed him at least once.
I have battles in my head about it all because I feel like to be part of the 'made it' crowd I have to have Felix sleeping through the night and I have to leave him to cry himself to sleep - self soothing or not meeting his needs. I would rather not risk the latter still so I go for the comforting edge. Crying is a baby's only language and yes, there are different cries but even if he is not hungry he does want comfort and do I need to leave him to cry himself back to sleep? Some would say yes and some would say that that is showing them that you are not there for them. Yes, I know there are extremes of both ideas and balance is the key but it can be tricky.

I guess doing it my own adds another difficult dimension as I don't have anyone with me to go in and soothe him to sleep, or feed him with a bottle, or give me a lie down, or bring him to me for a feed while I lie in bed. I don't have anyone to soothe me into believing Felix will be ok whatever I do because I love him and care for him and want the best for him and have the best intentions. I don't have anyone like that. I wonder if I could ask someone to take him for a walk now and again so I can have some space. I was up all night last night and I am really shattered.
Enough of the poor me stuff.... I am going to have a lie down now that Felix is finally asleep for his afternoon nap. I love my life with my boy though xxx

Here is my angel:

 

He rolls on his side a lot but isn't really rolling over properly much.

 

He is super active under the mobile now!

 

But generally chilled and alert.

 

Loves hanging out with friends and whanau...

 

Wish I could find more time to write but I can only manage these little posts at the moment.

 

Love to all.

Felix is 6 months!

... Actually he will be 6 months in 2 days but near enough.

We have been cruising and Felix is more and more beautiful and full of personality.

And... for the last 2 nights he has gone from 7pm until 7am without a feed! This is a first so it seems very poignant that he is coming up 6 months. He only seems to wake once a night and I go in and turn the static on and he goes straight back to sleep. No crying. If there was crying I would take that as he wants food or comfort and I would feed him but it hasn't happened. woop woop.

He seems to consistently sleep for an hour and half in the morning and then one or two shorter sleeps in the arvo. Although this morning he didn't want to go to bed so after our open home I took him for a walk and he slept at least an hour and a half but then only had a short sleep this arvo.

All good.... Love love love him.

Felix is 24 weeks or 5 months and 2 weeks!

Felix is a sleep with the radio static on and it is 9am.

Last night was a good night. He went to sleep at 7pm and didn't feed again until 3am (and probably didn't even need it then but he wasn't going back to sleep and I decided to intervene. He had woken at 10pm as well but I went in and put the static on. He was awake and chatting to himself at 7am. I love my angel.
It was good, no crying in the night and only one short feed at 3am. Now that is progress seeing prior to that he has only done one 7 hour stint and that was months ago. He has been a very active night owl. I have never let him cry a lot but I am happy with that. I think tiredness has meant that lately I have left him a wee bit more, but not much.

We are going to Plunket today so will find out what he weighs and his height etc. On Monday Rita from Plunket came to Brigid's house in Idris Road and we had good chats about solids and sleeping.

Felix hasn't started on solids yet. I am putting it off; partly because I can't be bothered, Secondly, because he isn't asking for it as such. Thirdly because they say anywhere from 4 to 6 months and lastly, I am reading Baby-led weaning and I am keen for him to eat with me at all meals and have food put in front of him that he can play with and/or eat when he is ready and wants to. I will try it and see how it goes.

Here is my angel this morning in my bed:

 

This was him yesterday in my bed.... he is a happy little man with a big heart!

And he is in big boy pyjamas now...

 

God he is beautiful!

And he loves his MorMor...

Last week at his antenatal group he became very interested in books... I read to him quite a bit now. He is into Hairy Maclary and friends - a set of 6 gifted to him by my supervisor/psychosynthesis therapist.

He is getting more and more curious and alert...

AND I am curious to find out if he is still in the 95th percentile. Look at those thighs!
and that is just breastmilk...

If looks could melt butter on a frosty day....

He lies awake a lot chatting to himself these days. I love it.

 Right, 9.30am and I am off to have a shower... will continue later today with plunket findings...

Right.. it is 2.46pm and Felix is back in bed. He slept this morning for an hour, and then went to babytimes at the library and plunked this arvo. he managed a sleep in the car in between and I went to Copenhagen for a pie! And to visit MorMor in bed with a cold. We are down with yukky colds!

 

Felix is now 8.8kg and 67 cm long.

Janine could only find one testicle but it was up very high and she wasn't certain that she could feel it so has referred him to the GP and he pay have to have surgery when he is two to bring them down if they aren't retrievable. No son of mine is going to have no balls!

 

Until next time xxx

Felix is 23 weeks or 5 months and 1 week!

Time is flying and I don't know where my little baby has gone.

Felix is now sitting up in his highchair, albeit slightly floppy.

He rolls his water bottle around and occasionally I will give him some banana to taste. I can feed him little amounts of mashed nana or I give him little pieces to try and chew. He is not really picking food up himself yet. But he will hold a stick of carrot and nibble on it if I give it to him. He his grabbing at things ferociously and his grip is so strong. All this has intensified in the last few weeks. He is not rolling very voluntarily but he is holding himself up strongly on his tummy.

 

 

This is Felix just yesterday in pyjamas for the first time. He is a big boy!

And here he is today on his playmat, only just started getting into it recently, when I lowered the toys.

Here he is looking very pensive with MorMor.

 

It was at Aunty Ju's where he went in a highchair for the first time...

 

 

And he had a sleep in Fredi's cot....

 

 

And a laugh with Aunty Ju...

 

 

It was my birthday a couple of weeks ago and we went to Aunty Ju's for a yummy brekky of eggs Benny. Then Felix stayed with Aunty Ju and the cuzzies while I went out for a couple of hours for the first time.

When mummy got back from her makeup birthday session at Ballantynes Felix got a big feed with a made-up mummy...

 

 

 Then we went to pops and Lala's for lunch and Felix got more laughs in for the day...

 

I am trying to work out his personality. He laughs and smiles a lot but he can also be very pensive and serious and I think he looks very wise...

Geez wayne he is definitely growing out of his capsule carseat...

I might have to start calling him the marshmallow man...

He sleeps in fairyland...

 

 

And sometimes we have special adventures to places like the Botanical gardens where we discover peace and tranquillity and with Spring on its way we also discover daffodils and cherry blossoms...

Felix Tane McVeigh is tangata whenua, in more ways than one and I think he likes the mamaku ferns and the koru will always speak to him I reckon.... NEW LIFE. He has a given a new and very special life to his mummy too.

 

I wonder if he knows that...

 

MorMor will always hold a special place in his heart, as will he in hers. And just look at those cuzzies... now that is Love.

 

This is love too.... and a very tired boy.

He is always up for an adventure more than he is for sleep though...

We had some visitors last week; Leneke and her beautiful girls, Charlotte and Katie.

MorMor and Felix sit and share, a moment of togetherness.

                                         Felix contemplating his life ahead

                                                                 MorMor reflecting.

ps. Here is a great shot of Felix with his plunket buddies a few weeks ago...spot the breastmilk belly!

 

Cute... all looking slightly drunk...